I’m sorry…

If only Bounty cured everything…  Almost…  And it takes the grease off my bacon, so there’s that.

Sooo, yeah, I’ve been on a 3 week long pity party – committing carbocide and convincing myself that I’m not really allergic to dairy nearly every day.  I’ve eaten everything.  All the food.  Everything.

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I even took pictures of a lot of it.  But not everything, because that means it really happened.  And that means I have to talk about it.  I have a problem.  I eat my feelings.  I hate feeling sad, angry, lonely, tired, hungry, discouraged, scared, oh wait, that all pretty much amounts to afraid of something.  So I stuff it down with food.  Lots and lots of food.  I gained 8 lbs.  Yah.  8.  I lost count of how many pints of Ben & Jerry‘s I ate.  I ate some good things too, but I ate a lot of bad.  I also watched a lot of movies and trash tv.  Maybe by talking about it, I’ll stop doing it.  So here goes…

My Dad is dying.  He has ALS, a.k.a Lou Gehrig‘s Disease.  He was diagnosed a little over 3 years ago and it’s a very slow and scary disease.  There is no known cause or road map with a progression.  It hits everyone differently.  My Dad, he lost his upper body strength first, the use of his tongue and throat.  He speaks through a program on an iPad, he takes all of his nourishment through a tube in his stomach.  And about 3 weeks ago, he went into the hospital for the 2nd time this year with what we thought was pneumonia.  Turns out, it’s just ALS.  I don’t want to go into all of it, but he was in the hospital for a week.  He got better and then he got worse.  He got better and then he got really really bad.  So bad, that I thought it was the end.  Really the end.  And then, someone gave him morphine.  Who knew that morphine could help him relax, open up his airways and allow him to breath and also to take the really horrific treatments that he needed to get the gunk out of his lungs.  He went home a couple days after that, with an Rx for morphine.  But I’m still eating.  As I sit here now, I’m eating this…

Photo on 5-14-13 at 9.02 PM

So here is my photo Journal of the last couple weeks…  I did my garden out front and got some awesome hanging baskets for my porch.

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Yes that is a cement penis in my garden.

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If you haven’t tried these pork burgers yet, I’m going to come find you.

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This is a shrimp recipe from Nom Nom Paleo iPad App.  You have to buy it.  It’s worth it.

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This is an amazing Cuban American Sandwich from this incredible little restaurant with a great story in Winooski, VT.  Misery Loves Co.  Their french fries are equally amazing.  They fry them with sage and rosemary.  Yummballs.

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This is my first vegetable garden ever!!

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I promise I didn’t buy them.  But I wanted to…

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Little Dude had a sleepover party.  I trained them right.  Except they ate all the bacon.  😦

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I refinished some old chairs and gave them new life!

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Up there is a meat plate.  Down there is a gas station birthday cake.

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and then I showed up at work to a plate of bagels.  I ate them.

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Someone I love posted this on my facebook page.

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His pirate name would be Bacon Beard

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Photo on 5-13-13 at 12.51 PM

I just think it’s funny that my coffee cup is larger than my head.  It’s not that funny that I have to wear child sized baseball hats.

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Oh yes, that is diner quality blueberry pancakes with what I’m betting is Log Cabin Maple Syrup.  I ate it all.

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This was today.  I had to drive through Vergennes, VT and got giddy at the thought that Daily Chocolate is just off the main road.  Pictured here are the Lemon Lavender Almond Bark and the Almond Toffee Bark.  I legit only stopped for the Lemon Lavender.

I also drove by Dakin Farms.  I picked up some Ribs and some Bacon Mac & Cheese for din din tonight.

So yah…

Does my butt look bigger to you?

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