I’m sorry…

If only Bounty cured everything…  Almost…  And it takes the grease off my bacon, so there’s that.

Sooo, yeah, I’ve been on a 3 week long pity party – committing carbocide and convincing myself that I’m not really allergic to dairy nearly every day.  I’ve eaten everything.  All the food.  Everything.

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I even took pictures of a lot of it.  But not everything, because that means it really happened.  And that means I have to talk about it.  I have a problem.  I eat my feelings.  I hate feeling sad, angry, lonely, tired, hungry, discouraged, scared, oh wait, that all pretty much amounts to afraid of something.  So I stuff it down with food.  Lots and lots of food.  I gained 8 lbs.  Yah.  8.  I lost count of how many pints of Ben & Jerry‘s I ate.  I ate some good things too, but I ate a lot of bad.  I also watched a lot of movies and trash tv.  Maybe by talking about it, I’ll stop doing it.  So here goes…

My Dad is dying.  He has ALS, a.k.a Lou Gehrig‘s Disease.  He was diagnosed a little over 3 years ago and it’s a very slow and scary disease.  There is no known cause or road map with a progression.  It hits everyone differently.  My Dad, he lost his upper body strength first, the use of his tongue and throat.  He speaks through a program on an iPad, he takes all of his nourishment through a tube in his stomach.  And about 3 weeks ago, he went into the hospital for the 2nd time this year with what we thought was pneumonia.  Turns out, it’s just ALS.  I don’t want to go into all of it, but he was in the hospital for a week.  He got better and then he got worse.  He got better and then he got really really bad.  So bad, that I thought it was the end.  Really the end.  And then, someone gave him morphine.  Who knew that morphine could help him relax, open up his airways and allow him to breath and also to take the really horrific treatments that he needed to get the gunk out of his lungs.  He went home a couple days after that, with an Rx for morphine.  But I’m still eating.  As I sit here now, I’m eating this…

Photo on 5-14-13 at 9.02 PM

So here is my photo Journal of the last couple weeks…  I did my garden out front and got some awesome hanging baskets for my porch.

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Yes that is a cement penis in my garden.

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If you haven’t tried these pork burgers yet, I’m going to come find you.

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This is a shrimp recipe from Nom Nom Paleo iPad App.  You have to buy it.  It’s worth it.

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This is an amazing Cuban American Sandwich from this incredible little restaurant with a great story in Winooski, VT.  Misery Loves Co.  Their french fries are equally amazing.  They fry them with sage and rosemary.  Yummballs.

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This is my first vegetable garden ever!!

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I promise I didn’t buy them.  But I wanted to…

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Little Dude had a sleepover party.  I trained them right.  Except they ate all the bacon.  😦

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I refinished some old chairs and gave them new life!

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Up there is a meat plate.  Down there is a gas station birthday cake.

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and then I showed up at work to a plate of bagels.  I ate them.

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Someone I love posted this on my facebook page.

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His pirate name would be Bacon Beard

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Photo on 5-13-13 at 12.51 PM

I just think it’s funny that my coffee cup is larger than my head.  It’s not that funny that I have to wear child sized baseball hats.

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Oh yes, that is diner quality blueberry pancakes with what I’m betting is Log Cabin Maple Syrup.  I ate it all.

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This was today.  I had to drive through Vergennes, VT and got giddy at the thought that Daily Chocolate is just off the main road.  Pictured here are the Lemon Lavender Almond Bark and the Almond Toffee Bark.  I legit only stopped for the Lemon Lavender.

I also drove by Dakin Farms.  I picked up some Ribs and some Bacon Mac & Cheese for din din tonight.

So yah…

Does my butt look bigger to you?

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Spring Fever

As you probably gathered by my previous couple posts, I’ve been in kind a rut lately.  After lunch with my BFF Nate today, I realized that it’s only Spring Fever.  Yesterday, it was 50 degrees and the sun was shining.  Today it was snowing, blowing and cold and gray.  Thanks Mother Nature.  HAHA April Fools.  I haven’t been trying new meals, desserts and baked goods yes of course, but not the real deal meals.  I had a new resolve.  Had a lovely salad bar, steak and steamed broccoli at The Windjammer for my lunch with my buddy man and then went off to Costco to fortify my fridge with plants, eggs, meats and the like.  $150 later and an hour later…  My truck was full of deliciousness.

I didn’t really have a plan in place except I knew I wanted to make these Bacon Chive Biscuits.  I threw together a Maple Mustard Balsamic Vinaigrette and used it to marinate the chicken and as a dressing for my tomato cucumber basil salad, I had a head of cabbage that needed using, so I googled “Paleo Coleslaw” and came up with this one, it had me at bacon…

Side note / side rant – what’s up with Pintrest?  I’m not on it.  Call me Old Fashioned (giggle) but I use Google.  I Google it and then bookmark it.  Everyone keeps asking me if I found it on Pintrest.  Do I need to know this?  For real??

Then I threw the chicken in the oven, made up the biscuits and sat down to play some Candy Crush.  I’m totally stuck on level 65.  Once the Dudes got home I put the biscuits in the oven and set to wait again.  Big Dude was talking on the phone when he came in and immediately opened the fridge and started taking the coleslaw out to try it.  To his credit he did offer me the first bite.  It was a hit!  He ate about 1/4 of the bowl while talking on the phone and I sat watching and laughing.

So this is the finished product…

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I will be honest and say the chicken was not very good.  I think it marinated too long.  And maybe I burned the biscuits a little.  Forgot to change the temp from 400 to 350.  But I’ll eat those for breakfast tomorrow with some bacon and eggs as suggested on the original blog!

I also tried to make sour gummy things, from this recipe, but they didn’t go over so well with the Little Dude.  I guess I’ll have to eat them…  I’ll try again some other time for him.

Now I’m off to snuggle that kiddo and watch some deliciously trashy TV.  Speaking of which, did you hear Shain from Buck Wild died yesterday?  I totally thought it was a really bad April Fools joke, but so far, it seems real.  Sad.  That was one of my favorite dirty little secret shows this past year.  It brought out my inner redneck.  RIP Shain.

Sweatpants Sunday

I freaking hate the time change.  I think it should be outlawed.  I woke up at 8, but it was really 9 and then I was late.  I hate being late.  My Mom was coming to take Little Dude snowboarding and Dad was gonna hang out with me today.  Everything ended up fine and all on time, but man.  I hate that immediate feeling of doom because you’re late.

I think I ate half of this loaf of Paleo Banana Bread today.  I put in several handfuls of walnuts and some deep dark chocolate chips.  It was AMAZEBALLS!  And maybe I had a couple extra shots of espresso.  It was a good day.

Dad and I hung out, talked and watched some Archer and The Americans.  Both are stellar shows.  When he took a nap I made the Gumbo with 2 lbs of shrimp, andouille sausage and sweet Italian sausage, extra veggies, spinach, and the Cauliflower rice.  I also made a side of Paleo Garlic Bread.  I don’t know what I did wrong, but the consistency was all wrong and it was more like drop biscuits.  No worries, they were still delish.  I think I’m gonna try to make a pizza dough out of it this week sometime.  Maybe fill it like a calzone?

Oh, and since the creme brûlée wasn’t ready last night, I served it up tonight after the Gumbo.  I can’t post a recipe, cause I kinda mixed a couple different ones together, but it was solo good.  Actually, I’ll try to recreate the recipe this week sometime.  My bro and his GF are coming to visit.  If I nail it, I’ll post it.  Anyway, it was awesome.